Therapy review

We had a review of our therapy progress a few days ago. You may have noticed I’ve not been reporting on therapy lately. This is because the post-adoption support agency we’re working with read my comments on this blog (I had to disclose I was writing it as part of the confidentiality agreement) and didn’t feel able to continue with our work unless I stopped reporting on what Robbie says during the sessions. They think it’s a breach of confidentiality, so I agreed not to. This is why I can report on the review, because Robbie wasn’t present. Anyway, the therapists thought we were making progress in some areas, particularly attachment, but there were others that will need further work, such as Robbie’s low self-esteem and his need to be self-reliant, sometimes unable to trust.

It’s now been agreed that we won’t continue with the SAI, which is a relief. The therapists have made arrangements so that we can use some of the funding that had been originally allocated for it to fund further DDP work, which is great. We find it much more useful.

The other thing that the therapists mentioned was the run up to Robbie’s birthday in a few days, and of course Christmas. They stressed how difficult this time is for adopted children, and that the best strategy we can use is to lower our expectations to avoid disappointment. Certainly I’d rather not have a similar experience to last year’s, when Robbie was so focused on what he couldn’t have (his birth family) that he was unable to enjoy what he did have. This is our third Christmas together and for the first time we’re having guests, Robbie’s godparents, stay with us. We’re hoping they’ll be a distraction and Robbie won’t sink into a low mood. There, I’ve done it again, haven’t I? Hoping for a good and peaceful day when we’ve been told to lower our expectations. Well, they do say hope is the last thing that dies…